I was standing at work early on a Thursday morning when I first felt the itch. Before lunch I was running to the bathroom every few minutes with a strong urge to pee. It was starting to burn. By the afternoon I was clocking out early to fly home and do something about the fire down below.
Having had a urinary tract infection (UTI) before I knew what was up. The symptoms included a frequent and immediate get the fuck out of my way I need to pee sensation, acute burning during urination, dark cloudy urine, and sharp pain beginning to creep up into my lower abdomen.
Shut The Front Door
There was no getting into the doctor on such short notice. It was a couple days before I could get an appointment. I knew however there was a bottle of Doxycycline for my DoxyPEP regime waiting in the medicine cabinet. It might work I thought.
After researching what recommended dosages of Doxycycline were for an UTI, I began the routine. It actually seemed to beat back the symptoms over the weekend as I waited for my Monday appointment to get fire put out.
At the time I didn’t know if I had a sexually transmitted infection (STI) or just a random everyday UTI. Expecting to get bitch slapped by my doctor for self medicating, I none the less honestly explained to them I had been taking the Doxycycline for a few days and it seemed to be helping.
To my surprise the doctor said that it was the best choice I could have made at the time given the circumstances. The only mistake was that I should have taken a higher dose than what I had been told by the Google. This is why we have professionals.
Standard mode of operation at my medical practice is act as if I have one of the standard STIs. Shoot first, test later. I got a shot in the butt and gave a sample of my urine which was sent to the lab for culture. The doctor prescribed a general antibiotic to take for seven days and would get back with me if the culture results dictated something different.
Results Are In
Lab testing took about a week and verified that I did not have an STI, which was nice – nobody to call with the uncomfortable conversation. What I did have was a UTI essentially caused by E. Coli bacteria. When I read this result a gut feeling came over me where I more or less knew how this all started.
You see kids, when gay men have anal sex, play with sex toys, or play with their holes and masturbate the E. Coli bacteria is almost always present. Sometimes it’s yours, other times it belongs to someone else. Simply put when you slide your tool into a place where E. Coli exists, you can get bacteria into your urethra.
Secondly, the generous amounts of lube all over you and everything can have E.Coli suspended in it. If you’ve been playing messy with sex toys or had your hands somewhere deep, you can transfer that to your urethra if your are handling your member or masturbating during the play scene.
Visions came to me of messy piggy play sessions in the days before this all started and pretty much knew what begat this UTI. We can clean, we can be careful but in the end if we’re going to be nasty pigs there is always a risk involved. Period.
Something To Take Seriously
When a UTI takes root it can spread rapidly up into the entire tract to the bladder and to the kidneys. If not treated right away it can result in not only extended pain and agony but can cause you some significant long term damage. There’s more but it is this isn’t a medical website with all that data. Do your research, call your doctor. The point is don’t let it fester even if the symptoms are manageable.
In my case a few days into the first antibiotic prescribed I started to feel it wasn’t working at all. The burning and frequent need to urinate was lessened but still happening. By week’s end it was coming back stronger. I suspended using it and went back to the stronger dose of the Doxy. At least it was working somewhat.
I called the doctor on Monday and complained like a precious bitch and they prescribed a second antibiotic. They later told me that the first one was particularly useless for the specific bacteria the culture revealed. The second antibiotic worked almost immediately and I took the seven day course.
The problem was that after the seven days the infection came right back within 24 hours. Another visit to the doctor was required, another urine sample given, and a 10-day round of the second antibiotic was re-prescribed. Additionally they sent me to get a CT scan to make sure I was not passing kidney stones which tangentially could cause a recurring UTI they theorized.
How It All Came Out
At the end of the second round of the second antibiotic it seems to have been kicked. Almost a full month of taking three different antibiotics, two doctor visits, multiple labs, and a CT scan were thrown at it. My digestive system was flowing hot lava with the near month of antibiotics, but finally getting back to normal. Yay.
Gratefully I have insurance, but still $150 in co-pays were spent and sexual activity for the most part had to come to a halt during all this time. Even if I wasn’t concerned about making matters worse, it would not have been all that enjoyable.
If You’re Going To Play, Be Prepared
My philosophy generally about being a nasty pig is, “if you’re going to play baseball you’re gonna get grass stains on your knees”. This means that if you play the game you should be prepared to pay the prices. The statistics are you will eventually get an infection of some kind along the way. You should expect it going into his pants – be a man about it. Do the right things when it happens.
There are ways to reduce the inevitability of it though. Condoms are always good if you can stand them but they are becoming a pretty rare sight. Having hand sanitizer, wipes, rubber gloves and a washout sink in the playspace are also a nice tools but I haven’t met many people this prepared in my local pig pool. I’m certainly not that prepared.
You can however be diligent about keeping your toys clean. Treat them like medical instruments when they get dirty. Have a dirty bin and a clean bin. Clean them well with hot water and soap. Don’t take them from one hole and put them into another without cleaning them first.
Pay attention to what hands you use for what and where you’ve put them. You did notice your doctor washing their hands after every time they touch you right? Your doctor also wears latex gloves sometimes and so do some players if they are really going deep if you know what I’m saying.
Keep your lube source clean. Liquids should stay in the bottle. If you have a big bucket of something like Elbow Grease or Crisco, don’t be dipping your filthy mitts or dirty toys in there and polluting it. Start first with clean hands separating out a quantity for play scenes into another container.
Clean everything up really super good when you’re done. This includes the greasy mess all over your lube containers, poppers if you use them, toys of course and any furniture the slime gets on. That’s bio-waste people. At my house we keep a special stash of washcloths and towels just for sex that go straight to the washing machine immediately after play. They don’t get tossed in with the regular laundry. They don’t get used for anything else.
Be Willing To Call The Doctor
Even if you do all of the above, it can still happen and in time it will. Have a good sex positive doctor at the ready you can get with quickly when these things come up. We are not giving medical advice here, we’re not doctors but if you are not HIV positive, look into getting on PrEP. It’s all but free now so there’s no excuse unless you have a health condition in the way.
Now you can add the additional protection of DoxyPEP for all the other bugs – not free but cheaper than treating most infections. In my case having the Doxy on hand was a valuable bridge while waiting for the doctor to put out the fire. Bonus.
Smoker of fine tires, eater of natural foods, connoisseur of aromatic leathers, pusher of limits.